It was about fifteen days after the start of my college life that an interesting comment caught me grappling with a dichotomy. Interestingly and most unbelievably, a friend of mine called me ‘Smart’. With the various interpretations that the word has (you could take it as handsome, street smart or both or even something else; with all interpretation carrying a positive connotation); I was pretty clear that it could not represent me. This was especially after the fact that not more than eight months back someone else had called the same me ‘Chambhu’. While many of us definitely understand the meaning of the word; the others who don’t just need to understand that it is not the most innocuous and pleasant comment on your personality. While I was pretty certain that it could not be me, the dichotomy was that some other voice from inside was forcing me to believe what I was being told.
Today, around six and a half years after that phase of dilemma, I am pleased I heard the other voice of mine. It is very easy to believe what you are but not as easy to try and change it- First in your head and almost as a thumb rule next in front of the world. It was essentially difficult to believe that comment then because I had, till then, been a victim of teasing which I always took as comments. Being fat, dumb and featuring in the worst performing students academically I had always had girls and boys twitching their noses at the first look of mine. Their expressions could speak much more than any word could. People never preferred noting down class work from me believing that I could never get it right. The fat was always to add to the woes. A tap, sometimes on the belly some other times somewhere else, suggesting where the fat had most pleasantly settled; creating a play ground for the ones who wanted to have fun. And, by the way, the one who called me ‘Chambhu’ was none other but the one my heart had missed a beat for and that too for the very first time. You might want to forget such crushes as some cute incidences of your childhood but words, they say, are sharper than swords. They cut you into pieces and there are hardly any adhesives unearthed which could get those parts together again. They somehow always stay with you- sometimes negatively hurting you badly while some other time positively motivating you to do things better. However, I somehow got lucky and got to believe in the latter.
Lightening, it is said, doesn’t strike at the same place again. Fortune, I believe, doesn’t either. That comment was like a lightening of fortune which I had to grab and fortunately I did. It all worked a combination. Losing thirty kilos in eight months wasn’t enough; I needed more to turn it around. I needed a friend and a guide which I got in the one who, now, has chosen to spend her entire life with me. My friend who taught me the art of being myself. My guide who didn’t only tell me how dumb I was but even motivated me to work on my English. And now a little more, my wife who is constantly next to me, giving me still those lessons of motivation. People might say she hasn’t done her MBA but if not, what is it that she has done to make this dumb weed to turn into the Best Student of the best communication institute of Asia?
It has been a story of desperate struggle with some non dying dedication. Being through all the lows gave me the motivation to enjoy the highs and work very hard to make them stay for long.
And if you are wondering towards the end as to why this piece of crap? This has been put in place for all those students who believe life is easy. It never is. They believe it has all been smooth with me all throughout. Probably they will now know how it has been. You should respect what you have because you might not get the opportunity again.
– by Mohit Masand
Mohit is an alumni of MICA, Ahmedabad- where he was adjudged the ‘Student of the year’. He currently runs his own content-only creative agency. Visit wordisticcreations.com to know more about it.